Life, Mental Health, Motivational, Wellness

When I Feel (A Glimpse of My Life)

These days, there are plenty of things that will drag your spirit down – social media comparison, decisions being made beyond your control, economic downturn…just to name a few. Some people can just trot right on with their lives as though these things don’t bother them at all. Other people get down-right depressed. Still others are somewhere in the middle.

It’s those people who, in my opinion, have it the hardest emotionally. Now, don’t get me wrong – being depressed is no picnic in the park, and neither is being the only “happy” person in your circle of influence. However, at least those people know just where they are emotionally.

Being a person with Borderline Personality Disorder, I know what it’s like to be in the middle – not knowing exactly how I feel from one minute to the next. And when I do feel, having that emotion be so intense that it all but consumes me and not being able to just acknowledge then release all in one fell swoop.

So, how do I deal with it?

I could say that I do a really quick meditation or visualization in which I see my trigger floating away down the stream or float up into oblivion on a cloud, but I’d be lying. The truth is that I shut down (which, in clinical terms, is “dissociate”). I retreat far into myself where nobody can reach me – “zone out” if you will. What can’t be seen is the war going on in my head to “snap out of it,” to deal with the situation in a more positive manner.

I hate the fact that I feel emotions so much more intensely than others in my immediate circle. I hate the fact that I can’t seem to live a “normal” life – a life free of such intenseness. (Is that even a word?) I try so hard to see a positive to this, but all I see is negative.

It’s a daily struggle – a struggle that I grow weary of fighting. But fight I do for it’s all I know to do. I am very thankful to my support system who love me no matter which aspect of my true self is showing up. I am very blessed to have the kind of husband who takes his wedding vows seriously – “for better or worse til death do us part” – and who does his best to understand what I’m going through.

Mental Health, Wellness


The past couple of weeks have been extremely difficult for me. I have been up-and-down, in-and-out of depression so much that I now have a season pass on the emotional roller coaster. Let me correct myself…a multi-season pass.


The only thing that I could do – which is the best thing – to prevent myself from sliding in too deeply was to reach out to my best friend. She is the only human on earth, it seems like, that totally understands what I go through. My husband, bless his heart, doesn’t get the severity of it all b/c he deals with his own special “demon.”

BFF Gets Me

Not only did she listen to me whine and cry “Woe is me! The world should revolve around me, but it doesn’t!” but also did she give me a lot….and I mean a lot!…of encouragement through her own experiences, her prayers, and her Bible reading. Because of the state that I was in, I ignored a good bit of the help she was trying to give. (Sorry, Bestie! Still love you, though.)

BBF No Judge

Next week, I’ll go over some tips that you can use to give yourself a lift in your journey out of the darkness.

Life, Mental Health, Wellness

I Really Needed This

It has been such a loooooooong summer……or so it seems. Having only 1 child has its perks – only having to pay for 1 set of everything, etc. – but it also has its drawbacks – the constant pleading for attention b/c there isn’t anyone else to play with.

That’s where it really wears me down. Especially when I have to go to town or work (I am in the family rental real estate business in addition to blogging), and he can’t go with me but refuses to stay home alone. (He’s old enough, and my parents are right down the street.)

Enter a mini vacation to Helen, Ga, with my aunt.


With the help of my hubby, I was able to get away for a few days and just relax. No housework, no “parental” work, no work except for relaxing.


The hotel room


My aunt and I spent the first couple of days just window-shopping. We saw a lot of really cute & funny things that made us think of family back home.



And we ate at some really great restaurants and had adult beverages.


And watched people as they tubed down the river. One fella was so relaxed that he had fallen asleep & didn’t realize that he’d gotten stuck on a rock…


All in all, it was a very good trip. Although I hated to leave, I was about ready to come back home.

And I’m glad I did!


Where is your favorite place to get away to? Leave a comment below!!

Mental Health, Wellness

Why Meditation Works

In last week’s post, I talked about meditating to help relieve yourself of mental stress. The more I looked into meditation, the more benefits I discovered!

Before I delve into my list, I want to be clear that I didn’t come up with these reasons on my own. I did my research, and I felt that this site gave the best scientifically based reasons for meditating. Plus you have access to more helpful links.

Here are 7 big reasons why meditation works:

  1. It boosts your health
  2. It boosts your happiness
  3. It boosts your social life
  4. It boosts your self-control
  5. It changes your brain
  6. It improves your productivity (in other words, it may help with motivation!)
  7. It makes you wiser and keeps you real

I have found that meditating really does work for these exact reasons! Try it for yourself and see if your overall wellness doesn’t improve. Then come back and tell me your discovery. 🙂



Mental Health, Spiritual Health, Wellness

Decompressing Yourself

Have you felt like a tightly stretched rubber band, ready to break at the slightest increase in tension? Every little noise just grates your nerves. The thought of your ever-growing To-Do list causes you to have a mental meltdown. Kids, husband, work, and community responsibilities pull at you from every which way but loose.

And you’re desperately looking for the light at the end of the darkest tunnel…

My friend, you are not alone.

With today’s myriad of activities, technological activities, and general “noise,” it’s more important than ever to find the calmness in the storm. More and more people are finding themselves on medication to treat ailments that can be linked to increased stress. (DISCLAIMER: I am not against medication. There is a time and place for medicine, and I am very thankful for that! I myself am on an anti-depressant to control my mental illness.)

In my various therapy sessions, I have learned the best way to help myself mentally – and, in turn, physically – is by meditation. I talked about meditation in my Facebook Live chat the other day. (If you missed it, you can watch the replay here.) This may be a little too “New Age” for some, but I really encourage you to try it.

Here’s how:

*Sit in a quiet room – either on the floor, criss-cross-applesauce, or in a chair with your feet firmly on the floor. Let your hands rest gently on your knees.

*Focus – close your eyes and focus your attention to your breathing…the way it feels when you inhale and then exhale. Should you find yourself thinking about your to-do list, acknowledge that thought (like, “Hello, Thought!”) and then bring your attention back to your breathing. Don’t judge yourself for getting distracted. Over time, it will get better.

Meditation doesn’t have to be hours and hours. Sometimes the most effective meditation I’ve had has been as little as 5 minutes. You can do that during your lunch break, before getting the kids, before bed, or whenever you need a quick decompress.

Try meditating this week and let me know how it effects your mental state.